“We want to give couples hope. We know that infidelity is painful, but marriages can heal if both partners are willing to do the work,” says Hilarie Barry. Hilarie and her husband, Joe are members at Delaware Grace Church in Delaware, Ohio, and have openly walked through their journey of infidelity and grace through the release of Hilarie’s new book, We Survived Infidelity.
A single text on Joe’s phone changed the course of their marriage and spiritual journeys.
“Two days before Christmas 2013, I sat in the dark at my daughter’s oversized dining room table. Like a delicate ornament balanced on a tiny hook, my world teetered on the edge of all I believed, all that seemed secure just that morning. I stared at the blank screen of my husband’s phone and willed my finger to push the button,” writes Hilarie in the opening chapter.
The full recount is described in the book. Neither one of them were believers at the beginning of their journey.
Being thrown into a whirlwind of what ifs, anger, and isolation, Hilarie was surprised to hear the Lord’s voice call to her in her brokenness. It was then that she and Joe began to attend Delaware Grace in hopes of repairing their broken relationship.
“God was calling to me,” says Hilarie as she recalls the story of God asking Abram to trust Him.
“I spent a lot of time in introspection working to become the man God intended me to be,” remembers Joe.
Through attending separate support groups geared toward marital unfaithfulness through the church, Joe and Hilarie began to not only repair their relationship but also began to form a new relationship with God.
It’s been six years since the healing process began for Hilarie and Joe. They have been investing in other couples through leading support groups for men and women at Delaware Grace. In addition to that, Hilarie’s website, found here, provides support for women impacted by infidelity through encouraging blog posts and links to resources.
“The journey isn’t easy,” says Hilarie, “We encourage group members to look to the Lord and trust His plan.
We Survived Infidelity is available for purchase on Amazon here. Joe and Hilarie are available for virtual or local speaking events and can advise those wishing to start support groups.
[Connect:] Send Hilarie and Joe an encouraging note here